sure I might be happy if I died, like that song about that dream but I just lied. I just tried, to not be such a burden maybe if I had a daddy my mind won’t be hurten and I’ll be happy. My mama won’t be stressing to death and my sis would be working a dream job for certain she’s the best. My mommom would remember me and I would have never failed Chemistry giving in to every temptation, went from MG to academic probation. Problem is life is waiting, and I was born impatient. Maybe if I fuck the maybe’s would go away and bring back my luck CAUSE FACE IT I’m stuck. On tumblr feeling dumber than dumb and dumber but not as funny, maybe if she sends some nudes for those exciting ways distract me from being bored lonely and tacky. Never mind I don’t deserve it im a pervert with illusions of a poet who’s in love with her and acts like she knows it but truth is he beats his dick to her in the dark hoping one day a conversation just starts with her on-line where its safe to lie all the time. Reliving a fantasy where she’s mine just brings pain to his veins but that courage he finds. Take this humble sick bullshit as a sign everything’s fine then he grab the nine and pulled it. 

dead.

I still need her to breathe Lying bout the pain on my knees crying in the rain look in her eyes like nothing’s changed, can’t be happy if I’m to blame not to give a fuck so roll up my needs include mary jane. Low life is very lame just for one touch I give it up. The suns down now back to the story with a gun sound, headshot her heatless ways had me dumbfound stuck in a daze everything slowed it counted as a fade. Heard her say I loved you as I fell she ran away and there I laid, whole in my chest in a pool of blood full of rage. Thoughts of my choices second guessing of how a runaway love was my favorite weapon. I’ve always been the worst friend to me, complacently depressed with suicidal tendencies, which is why my request was the end of me. At least now I can chill, I love you baby even when you kill, even when its me I know the deal. Too late to be happy moments to live and can’t get you off my mind still, if life’s a beach death is peace with an eternity to heal. 

please come back you know I will…………………………..

and it was you. Red eyes locked love struck blue. The risk never worth the reward, too late regretting my steps walking towards. Will always remember the feel of you if I may calm myself from the beating inside I’m screaming trying to hide dumb pride keep cool on the surface. Play it cool J you’re not nervous. Show no fear, take her to a place show her she’s safe here. My mind runs with thoughts of a perfect stranger, before we speak I want to thank her. Because I know. The Endless possibility she’ll seal my fate willingly as we grow. Ignore the caution I trust my gut to lead my fall, lust is what they call, dangerous. To be alive is to want it all even her angelus ora absent of any flaw. From the start Falling apart leaning on the wall, hold it together staring in her eyes seeing forever. In a trance knowing this game we play is the deadliest dance. I will have her, won’t leave without her, still don’t know what to say. Whatever words get you to stay. Being Too honest might scare her away, truth be told I fell in love that day. I just wanted you. I just wanted you. Two lovers Fell victim to each others view. I just wanted you. I just wanted you. A slave to your burning desire is nothing new. I just wanted you. I just wanted you. Each turn of the page we crave to save what was true. I just wanted you. I just wanted you, always babies and still do.

A bunch of bastards and goblins waving fist in the air heart throbbing Running down the street screaming Its a New Day mobbing. There red eyes was a surprise Come join the fun its just a disguise. I dropped my bookbag couldn’t wait to escape with crooks that knew how to party. I’m normally so blue with nothing to do suffering from slight depression like my life in question is nothing to you. Friends I imagine when alone not too sad to tell but too sad to rome. What happens to the forgotten souls turned rotten on they way home. Old bits of a vague story you never known. Cold quiet place equally safe for my vision to see, my stage resides behind closed eyes where I listen to me. Sick to my stomach when I think about what was, not due to the lack of love but just because…shaking to the notion willing when emotions peeling back on those nights my mind’s full of fright feeling trapped. See the light then back out to a fight where I black out whiling half alert mostly numb smiling like that’s a good thing. Hope could bring a needle in my vain cooking up some sane but we’ll leave that to you

so many people to please I lose track of me

Learning they’ll leave I watch them turn their back to me

Ashamed I Never aimed for social gain

fuck it in public due to lack of accuracy 

I asked her when we fuck can she hear the music

I dreamed of rain woke up and felt stupid

Breaking down crying at the smallest thing

Something so tiny it reminds me we’re all to blame

A story stranger than fiction. Similar to that good feeling we’ve been missing. What’s at stake kissing music as we serenate a beautiful tragedy laughing at our fate. Know the end but I smile when you tell it, too unique when you speak explicit with your method. Far from PG as you tease me this ain’t easy my love grows for you more deeply, more than you need me. Hold my breath when you leave, touch me when you breathe, such disdain met with Imminent pain between Something to love and nothing to gain. Endless attempts to steal the heart of an angel left him mangled but he remains. Lips sealed What’s broken bones in this broken body a kiss can’t heal.  Layers of truth revealed that Emotions peeled back showed us raw. Lost Confused kids scared of who we are. Won’t cry Instead I shed a tear, for lies we tried to endear. To do what’s right in the face of fear. I’ll die lying here just to make it clear…

Loves just.

Its been two weeks since I realized your beauty skin deep. Treading water on ya lips before I speak. Your complection fetching no 2nd guessing plan to break it off that’s when you start to take it off. Love’s playground is when you lay down Nothing better However my feelings false. Hollow Steps to your heart Misleading thoughts, regret tends to make amend in the end. Trust in our lust in the dark, Now how can I pretend when your body for the moment is mine again. Don’t mean to be stressing Excuse my confession every inch yearning ya blessing. Goosebumps on her frame Awaiting my touch, such is a shame if my feelings change after we fuck. 

Without you barely breathing grab my chest I’m wheezing, wanting all of you stop teasing. I’m fall for you and every season, no telling what summer and spring will bring but if you’re gone by december it will be the coldest winter ever. If you and I not together, don’t know what I’ll do but you know better. Please promise you’ll never leave. I promise eventually, find you and it’ll be, perfect. Don’t make me kill, even though you deserve it but still…remember when I lost my grip high up on that cliff and you fucking slipped, remember when I showed up at your internship, unexpected you were shocked cause I punched that nigga on ya dick and didn’t stop. You swore I was sick but, we’re fine baby that was a hiccup. Standing outside ya window screaming you’re mine, good times. Smiling cause I Forgave you and I forgive you. Nobody understands what we been through, all our ups and downs we live through. Most don’t get it we’re complicated so don’t forget it. Too complex  to be with anybody else so don’t stress I’m always here to help. I’m always here wish you see that! Not that bad guy you make me out to be but I’ll Be that! All this time apart makes me lurk, you don’t think that makes me hurt. Wtf bay You text ya friend one day he’ll pay. Funny you don’t mean that I mean that’s not nice to say. Hate it when you away, now you made me raise my voice baby please don’t make this choice. Please don’t force my hand to correct your mistakes you know I can. Sometimes I get a little dark and yea it breaks my heart then water fills my eyes as the rage starts, barking. Wheres my herb I’m sparking cause baby you fucking crazy, you don’t mean this shit you talking. We just been out of sync lately. But baby don’t hate me I don’t mean it. No more hating patiently waiting see I dreamed it. You and I are one, no more other guys. Look in my eyes You can feel it when I hold you down otherwise imagine your life in the ground a breathless sunrise not making a sound.. Can’t change the way I am. I know you’ll understand. I know you understand. Now stop fucking playing and call me. I’m your man and I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

bouncing to the feel of that ass, making love on a train now make it last, she doesn’t say my name she screams i’papi in the reflection as she watch me, Switching positions at every stop you can’t stop me. I’m licking ya pussy dripping baby you got me. The greatest I had to taste it living forever in those moments never wasted. This gift you give me I can’t replace it. I can’t even begin to, cause when I’m in you, time stands still I’m one with the present the past the real. My future you ain’t gotta ask because it is you. I never plan to miss you my sweet valentine nothing short of a divine feeling when I’m kneeling more than willing to make you mine. Feel immortal when I have you. Reach across the stars just to grab you. Now feel the steel, soft kisses on my chin as I slide in, short breaths long moans the bites make it right on the ride home.